“Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest.” – Joshua 1:9
DO NOT BE AFRAID
GET IT OUT OF YOUR MIND
FEAR IS NOT FROM GOD
Easier said than done right? DON’T I KNOW IT. That is how I lived most of my life, afraid, under a cloud of Fear and Anxiety. I am just now learning how to get out from under it, in spite of the breast cancer diagnosis. In spite of all the things that my humanity tells me, I am learning to trust God instead.
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.” -Proverbs 3:5
Somewhere along the way I allowed Fear and Anxiety to take control of my life. I began listening to the Spirit of Fear at a very early age. I allowed it into my head and it gained a stronghold in my mind. It eventually became part of my personality. I developed unhealthy coping mechanisms for dealing with Fear. Nervous habits eventually developed into Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (O.C.D.) and the Spirit of Fear would become my life’s companion.
My O.C.D. kept my worries at bay. Repetitive prayer, and (apparently) light switch flipping, door knob checking, breath holding, and, (among other things) the anxiety ridden touching of objects until things “just felt alright”, began to become part of my daily routine. Fear told me that my ritualistic behaviors would keep things going “on track” and “as scheduled” for a safe and happy life. After all (I rationalized) God must have a special connection with me, a reason that He wanted me to do all of these things. I would help God keep the world spinning around on its proper axis with my great O.C.D. powers to keep evil at bay…like a spiritual super power… this was my way of remaining “in control” of my life. But what it really was, was a lie. A lie that I lived under for forty years.
It was exhausting carrying the weight of the world around on my shoulders, and with the passage of time, I was getting tired under the weight of the burden. Then one day my world came crashing down around me…
“WE ARE HIGHLY SUSPICIOUS”
Those were the words that started the journey I have been on for the last 11 months. The next weeks were spent in a whirlwind of doctors appointments; mammograms, biopsies, an MRI, and “cancer team” consultations. Information flooded me from all sides. For those who have undergone a cancer diagnosis, you know, overwhelmed would be an understatement. With one of my worst fears being realized, I began unraveling. My sense of security had been completely stripped away from me and I was left bare and vulnerable. I was struggling. It took awhile, but eventually I boiled it down to two things, FEAR and CONTROL.
FEAR
What is fear? What are we experiencing when we feel fear? What causes fear? I stumbled across this article by John Piper who wrote that “anxiety seems to be an intense desire for something, accompanied by a fear of the consequences of not receiving it.” I thought to myself, so basically fear is similar to a temper tantrum. I want to live. I want to grow old. I want to see my son get married. Having a cancer diagnosis made me fearful that I may not be able to experience those things that I want. I may not get what I desire.
CONTROL
What is control? Because I was losing it… Cancer had been found in my body and with it came the stripping away of all sense of security that I had built up around myself. Cancer took away my control, or rather, it took away my false sense of control. PERCEIVED CONTROL IS ALL THAT WE HAVE. I had trusted in myself and my own actions, to manipulate and determine the outcome of any of my given circumstances. This had proven to be futile.
Why do we think that we have control over anything? Thinking that we can control anything is VANITY. It is a form of PRIDE. You and I are not in control of anything. We were never in control. I am on the other side of that lesson, but it took cancer to get me there.
“Surely God will not hear vanity, neither will the Almighty regard it” – Job 35:13
This passage is going to be overloaded with scripture. Do you know why? Because Fear is a strong spirit. We need an arsenal to fight it. We need the sword of the Spirit. Ephesians 6:17 says that “the sword of the Spirit is the word of God”. We are going to need God for this.
You and I are going to start living by two biblical principals found in Matthew 6:33-34:
SEEK YE FIRST THE KINGDOM OF GOD;
TAKE THEREFORE NO THOUGHT FOR THE MORROW: FOR THE MORROW SHALL TAKE THOUGHT FOR THE THINGS OF ITSELF; SUFFICIENT UNTO THE DAY IS THE EVIL THEREOF;
God is telling us two things here: Put God first, look for Him, seek Him out in your daily life; Do not worry about tomorrow, let tomorrow worry about itself, you have enough on your plate today.
I knew that I was living in a way that God did not intend, but I was stuck under the weight of my own emotions. I knew that my fears were in opposition to how God was calling me to live, but how could I get from point A (fear) to point B (faith)? How do we let go of our false sense of control? Is it as simple as “Trust in the Lord?!” Leave my destiny in God’s hands?… Hey, wait, isn’t it already there? We kid ourselves if we think not.
I have been a Christian all of my life. But I was a messed up Christian. I was a daughter unaware of the great powers of her Father. I was ignoring who my Father says He is and I was ignorant to who I am in Him. I was trying to do His job for Him, without the tools and without the strength that it takes to perform the task. When all the time He was there ready to move, just waiting for me to ask Him. When I was diagnosed, I started spending more time with the Lord. With as much time as I was spending in doctor’s appointments, I began spending even more time on my knees. I have a prayer spot, a place that I go to to spend time with God. I started going there more often. I started dictating healing scriptures into a journal and would read them out loud every night during prayer. I cried out to Him, I begged Him for help, and He was there with me, a light in my darkness.
Did you know that as children of God, we do not have the right to be afraid? That is right, we do not have the right to be afraid. Fear is a sin.
Jesus said “let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” – John 14:27
Anxiety and fear is a sinful response to God’s care. In this article by Meg Bucher, she says that fear is a lack of trust in God, our protector, defender, provider, and healer. She goes on to say that fear is a manifestation of pride, and that pride isn’t only a puffed-up sense of misplaced confidence, that it is also doubting who God made us to be, and doubting who God is.
“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” –Revelation 21:8
Notice the first thing mentioned at the top of the list that will earn you your place in the lake of fire? It is being fearful. Fear my friend, is the opposite of faith. In fact, the only time that God condones fear, is when we are told to fear God. The second on the list is unbelief. Who do you believe God is? Is He enough or not? It is time to decide what you believe about your God. You can use what you are going through now to become stronger than you have ever been before, or you can crumble under the weight of your own fears. Which is it going to be?
In the book of Mark, in Chapter 4:36-41, we see a famous story about Jesus and his disciples crossing over a body of water during a storm. It says: “And when they had sent away the multitude, they took him even as he was in the ship. And there were also with him other little ships. And there arose a great storm of wind, and the waves beat into the ship, so that it was now full. And he was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow: and they awake him, and say unto him, Master, carest thou not that we perish? And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. and the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. And he said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith? And they feared exceedingly, and said one to another, What manner of man is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?”
The disciples were afraid. The storm was overwhelming them. The winds were powerful and strong. Things looked dark, water filled the boat, and they were sure that they were perishing. They called to Jesus, don’t you care?! But what was Jesus doing? RESTING. SLEEPING. How dare he? Didn’t He care that his friends were perishing?! No, in the midst of the seemingly perilous circumstances, Jesus was not afraid. He rebuked the WIND, he told the SEA to be still. Jesus knew who he was. He knew the power of the LORD. He knew what He believed. Do you?
This is a major lesson, and many people stop there, I know I did, but there is a second part to this story that is easily missed. I was stuck in my fears, stuck in my storm. I knew that God was calling me to stop being afraid, but I just could NOT get there. My attempts just made me more anxious and left me feeling like a failure that had no right to God and his mercy. I was left feeling that my faith was not enough to be pleasing to God. But I did not give up. I kept seeking Him, and praying, and one day he opened these scriptures to me. This was my gift, He blessed me with this online article by a man named Jon Bloom. Go ahead and read it, I’ll wait…
………………………….. did you read it?………………. you seriously need to read it……………..
Okay, are you back? If you read it… that is what I was missing. The first light bulb came on for me after reading that article. Thank you Mr. Bloom, whoever you are! Now let’s back track…
“Master, carest thou not that we perish? And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. and the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. And he (Jesus) said unto them, Why are ye so fearful? how is it that ye have no faith? And they feared exceedingly, and said one to another, What manner of man is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?”
They turned their fear towards Jesus. They feared the God-Man who controlled the elements. They placed their fear on the more worthy vessel.
“The LORD on high is mightier then the noise of many waters, yea then the mightie waves of the sea.” -Psalm 93:4
Now this was something that I could wrap my head around. I had lived most of my life in fear. It was second nature to me. Now, after cancer, to live a perfect life of faith with zero fear? Not happening right now. But transferring my fears, that I could do. That was way more attainable. What did I believe about my God? That was the question laid at my feet. It was my time to choose. I was either going to believe that He is who He says He is, or I was going to have to call Him a liar. Which is it going to be Jennifer? Which is it going to be YOU? It was time to make a choice. I took my first step towards freedom from Fear through this action. I chose to believe that God is greater than whatever it is that I may be fearing. To realize that to fear anything other than God is a form of idolatry. Whatever the object of my fear is, I can be sure that I think it is greater than my God and it is time to rethink the issue.
God is GREATER than what you are afraid of!
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath TORMENT. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” -John 4:18
God says do not fear, that fear is a sin. Just look up how many times in the bible that the Lord commands us not to fear. WE HAD BETTER LISTEN TO HIM. AFTER ALL HE IS GOD. We need to choose to fear God rather than the lesser and if God is in the right place of power in our lives, guess what, it is ALL LESSER, even cancer. Our God commands us:
“Fear thou not; for I am with thee; be not dismayed;” (WHY?) for I am thy God: I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.” – Isaiah 41:10
There is nothing greater than our God, nothing more powerful, and He commands us not to fear. Why aren’t we more afraid that we are ignoring God’s word? it is ignoring the Lord that is hazardous to our health. He makes many promises to us, he asks us to live a certain way, he calls us to live by faith. We are afraid of so many worldly things, why aren’t we more afraid of disobeying Him? We are of little faith.
In Mark 5:36, Jesus says “Be not afraid, only believe”. It is time to start trusting him. The only thing that we are to fear is the Lord.
“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on thee; because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength. -Isaiah 26:3-4
According to the book of Proverbs, the fear of the Lord is to hate evil, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, the fear of the Lord prolongeth days, the fear of the Lord is strong confidence: and his children shall have a place of refuge; The Fear of the Lord is a fountain of life, and tendeth to life. The fear of the Lord are riches, and honour, and life. Whoso putteth his trust in the Lord shall be safe… I wanted this.
If we are fearing the enemy and his lies, then we are not fearing God. God is greater. God gets the fear, God gets the glory. We are to ignore everything else.
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” – 2 Timothy 1:7
“Behold, the eye of the LORD is upon them that fear him, upon them that hope in his mercy” – Psalm 33:18
“God is our refuge and strength: a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea.” -Psalm 46:1-2
So far so good right? With all of these scriptures opening up to me, things were looking up. It looked like now I had it all figured out. Now I was on the right track. Now I had it all together. I wasn’t going to be afraid of cancer anymore. Great, perfect, got that beat. Just trust in the Lord and be more afraid of Him. Armed with my new found “wisdom” I was on top of the world, things were going to be okay now, but guess what? Not even close.
THINGS DIDN’T GET THAT MUCH BETTER. KNOWING WAS NOT ENOUGH
I understood the concept, but it was only somewhat helpful. Not much changed. I was now consciously aware of what needed to take place. I was now conscious of my sin. But I was still having fearful thoughts about the cancer. I found that even when I wasn’t thinking about it, it just crept in there. I would be blissfully minding my own business, watching a movie, spending time with my family, and fearful thoughts would assault me out of nowhere. The fear of the cancer coming back would come upon me when I felt least likely to be thinking about it, and there it would be. Gnawing and most unwelcome thoughts would drop in at any given moment and take me unawares. I was discouraged, but I just kept praying and pleading with God for help. One of my most prominent prayers was for God to replace my fears with faith. It would take some time, but God was faithful, and some months later He opened a doorway for me.
I firmly believe that He led me to read the book by Dr. Henry Wright called “A More Excellent Way”. In this book it discusses the spiritual roots of disease. This book introduced a concept to me; that the thoughts we have may not be our own.
“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” -Ephesians 6:12
It may be that we have been listening to the enemy for so long that we can’t tell the difference between his voice and our own. Our enemy is not of the physical world. Our enemy is in the Spirit world and the battlefield of choice is our mind. The war that we fight is a spiritual battle, not one that we can physically see, but one that we experience every day. The battle between good and evil is fought within. I don’t know if you have noticed, but I have been referring to Fear as a Spirit and I believe that in the most literal sense. Call me crazy, but this has changed my life.
In his book, Dr. Wright brought to my attention that when Adam and Eve hid their nakedness from God in the Garden of Eden, God’s question to Adam was “Who told thee that thou wast naked?”. Why did God ask this question? He didn’t ask “how did you know that you were naked?” or “how did you find out that you were naked?” He specifically asked “Who told thee that thou wast naked?” Why? It was because God did not tell them they they were naked. They had got that information from somewhere else, someone other than God. They opened themselves up to sin. They opened themselves up to the enemy. They allowed a voice other than God’s to speak to them.
As a child, when I had a fearful thought, I allowed it, I entertained it, I believed it. I chose to listen to it. I allowed the Spirit of Fear to move in and take control. God never intended this. I had listened to a false god all my life. I had allowed the enemy to come in to my head. This was my sin, this was idolatry. I listened to the enemy instead of listening to God. When I chose to listen to Fear I gave it power over my body. After years of stress and anxiety being allowed to reign in my body, it affected my brain. It was able to make biological changes in me, physiologically changing my DNA, and I am now suffering the consequences of living in sin. God had pointed it out to me, now I had to take responsibility for it.
REJECT THE LIES. START LISTENING TO THE LORD.
Once you understand this concept the rest is the daily battle inside of you.
“Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;” -Ephesians 6:10-18
It is not the thought that is sin, the thought is the enemy tempting you to sin. It is what you do with the thought, what you do with the enemy. Do you accept it or do you reject it? Who do you choose to walk after? The Liar? or the Way, the Truth, and the Life? I now have a spiritual “ping pong” game going on in my head. I arm myself daily with the Word of God, and every time a thought that goes against what God tells me tries to creep into my head, I use my shield of faith to bat it away immediately. These thoughts have no place in the head of a child of God! From now on when you have a fearful thought, give it to God and leave it there.
“Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7
Will you choose to live by faith, or do you choose to live in fear? In the face of what may be the biggest storm of your life, will you believe that the storm is greater than the Lord? Is there anything that He cannot do?
Will you choose to walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit? Where is your heart? Are you letting it unravel in the fear of losing this body? You are not your body. You are a spirit, and if you believe in the Lord, you will live forever. And by the way, you have no idea what will happen to you, nobody does. Remember, we are not in control.
If God says do not be afraid, we can choose to TRUST him and we need not be afraid. Why?? BECAUSE GOD SAID SO. THE GOD OF THE UNIVERSE ASKS US TO LIVE BY FAITH.
The apostle Paul had some things to say about this battle between the Spirit and the Flesh:
“For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.” –Philippians 1:21
“For I am in a strait betwixt two, having a desire to depart, and to be with Christ; which is far better” -Philippians 1:23
We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord. -2Corinthians 5:8
“For whether we live, we live unto the Lord; and whether we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we are the Lord’s.” -Romans 14:8
We are spiritual beings. We are Spirit, Soul, and Body. This body is temporary, God refers to it as a tabernacle, or a tent. We will get a new one eventually, an eternal, permanent one. So just remember, God can do all things. God can heal all sicknesses, but even if he chooses not to, the worst thing that can happen to us is that we move from our temporary home to our permanent one with God. Remember those that believe in Him shall never die. So long as you believe, you will never taste death.
The bible says, “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me” -Psalm 23:4
Remember Matthew 6:32-34: “for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”
Get through TODAY, don’t worry about tomorrow. GET THROUGH THIS MOMENT, don’t worry about the next. Sometimes I find myself singing that little silly song from Santa Clause is Coming to Town, “Put one foot in front of the other, and soon you’ll be walking ‘cross the floor”…
We are not always going to be able to see what God is doing. We are not always going to be able to understand it, but we need to trust Him. Even in the face of our worst fears, believe on Him and Trust Him, just because He said to. We are a peculiar people called to live by faith in the face of what logic seems to present to us.
“But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvelous light;” – 1 Peter 2:9
There is light in the darkness and Hope for the journey. You will get through this, one way or another, no matter what side we end up on, we will be okay. We are women of faith and hope. By the way my O.C.D. is severely diminished. It’s not completely cured, but I’m getting there. Freedom from Fear is not immediate, this is a daily fight. Some days are better than others. Practice using that shield of faith. I promise it gets easier. I am a work in progress. it took me years worth of being submerged in fear, and then, the realization of one of my worst fears for me to want freedom from it bad enough to start gnawing my way out. And it wasn’t me that got me there in the end, it was Him.
I used to be a woman of fear and pride and doubt. I hope I never go back there. I was paralyzed by fear when I was diagnosed. The only reason I had the courage to get through the surgery was because I couldn’t get it out of my body fast enough. I was a wreck post-surgery. Then the thought of chemotherapy scared me beyond belief. But I was not alone. I was learning my lessons through the storm. By the time I got to radiation I was making progress. This is a journey we are on, this is a new life style we are learning.
You are going to get through this. One moment at a time. One breath at a time. God will strengthen you for each step of they way, you only need ask. Rely on His strength, and not your own (you probably don’t have much of your own at this point anyway). I promise to write about my real life experiences through cancer. I did the bilateral mastectomy. I did the chemotherapy. I did the radiation. I did the tissue expansion. I am doing the Tamoxifen. I will eventually write about it all, in hopes that it will alleviate some of your fears. The unknown is scary, and YouTube and Google can be extremely frightening, but just remember who we have on our side. Never forget that. When people tell you “you got this” and you just want to tell them that you “don’t got this”, that you just have no choice, that it is just what is in front of you, remember that “God’s got this”.
Thank you God for providing us a way out of fear. For providing us a way. I love you, your mercy is great.
A sister in Christ prayed a similar prayer for me and now I pray it for you:
Dear Heavenly Father, I pray for the person reading this now. I pray that you will take over every cell of their spirit, mind & body. I pray that you will replace every doubt, and every fear, with incredible faith so that they do not waste any moment of their time here on earth worrying about things that haven’t happened. Help them Lord to be present in the moment so that they can see all the beauty You have for them this day. Lord, we long for your peace that surpasses all understanding. You say in Your Word that if we ask anything in Your name, and in Your will, that it will be done. We know that this peace for us is within your will. We rebuke Satan and the Spirit of Fear in the name of Jesus! We ask that Fear will no longer have a stronghold in our lives. We know that it is a liar & of the world, but Jesus that is in us, is greater than he that is in the world. We are more than conquerors! We are victorious! We declare that in the mighty name of Jesus!! He is the way the truth and the life. We thank you in advance for the countless miracles that you are working in our lives right this very minute Lord and we look forward to praising you and giving you all the glory, in Jesus Name, Amen.
“I Shall not die, but live and declare the works of the Lord. The Lord hath chastened me sore: but he hath not given me over unto death.” -Psalm 118: 17-18
“But when Jesus heard it, he answered him, saying, Fear not: believe only, and she shall be made whole.” -Luke 8:50
